What is it with kids and bathrooms?

Seriously. What is it with kids and bathrooms? I can't get my kids to voluntarily walk into the bathroom. They make up every excuse in the book as to why they don't have to pee or why they don't need to brush their teeth. Yet, if I walk into the bathroom, it's like Mommy just entered a toy store and didn't invite them.

"Can I pleeeaaaseee come in?"
"Mommy! What are you doing in there?"
"Mooooommmmyyyyy??? Where aaaarrreee yoooouuu?"

Wine O'clock.

Just because I'm on a tight budget does not mean I am going to forgo wine time. No sir. There are too many health benefits, such as keeping your sanity after a long day with the kids or numbing the pound of a headache from a screaming baby. And the other ones too, like blood pressure, antioxidants, you know, the health benefits the doctors talk about.

I may not be able to drop $20 on a bottle of wine but I can still enjoy a glass of a decent Merlot. Below is a list of my three favorite budget friendly wines. I must note though, if you're having a wine snob over for dinner, I probably wouldn't serve one of these. But if it's just you, you can learn to drink cheap wine and enjoy it. Trust me. Cheap wine is better than no wine.

1) Charles Shaw - "Trader Joes Three Buck Chuck" - $2.99



2) Rex-Goliath - $3.99 - They sell it at Wal-Mart. Don't judge. Trust me. It's decent.



3) Lucky Duck - $3.99 - This one is actually my new favorite.



Also, take a little time in the wine section of your local grocery store and see what's on sale. There is always a good deal going on where you can get a $12.99 bottle of wine for $7.99 and so forth. Take advantage of deals like this when you have to bring wine over to someone's house.

Best Job in the World

Yesterday my kids were animals. They pretended to be monkeys, dogs and turtles. Today they are secret agent men. Last week they were doctors and the week before they were pilots. I get to watch their imaginations take them all over the world in our living room. They invent tools out of straws, books, paper towel rolls and string. I get to see their frustration when something doesn't work and their proud smiles when it does.

The days bring tears, shouts, laughter and whispers. They get mad at each other, mad at me and sometimes mad at themselves. At times they get so excited they can't contain themselves and other times they remain so calm, I worry. They dance around the house, chase bugs in the yard, meet new people when we go out and are always pondering why the world works the way it does. And I get to see it all. More than that really, I get to experience it all.

I know my kids hesitate before big decisions and my oldest gets embarrassed when I catch him talking to himself. I know what my kids like to eat for lunch and when they are getting tired. I know where every scrape, scratch and boo boo came from because I'm usually nearby to help kiss it. I know when to give them a moment and when they need a hug. Yet, everyday I learn something new about them.

I have the best job in the world.

Monkey Business

Imagine two monkeys. Imagine those two monkeys climbing all over someone - pulling their hair, smearing bananas on their face. Imagine those monkeys squealing and screaming. Now replace those monkeys with two little boys. Yep. That was my day.


Source: http://www.monkey-pictures.net

Mommy Guilt

I've always had it, well since I've had kids that is. I've heard all moms have mommy guilt but I think it stems from different things and manifests for different reasons. I thought I was the only mom with mommy guilt related to "me time" but I overheard someone else talking about the exact guilt I feel. She was explaining that since she stays home with her kids and her husband works, she feels guilty leaving him with the kids when he gets home from work or on the weekends. I do the same thing. My husband doesn't mind taking "me time" for himself. I know lots of working moms that don't mind doing things on their own and leaving the kids with their husbands. So why do stay at home moms have this guilt? After a little thought, I think I may know why, or at least this might be why in my case.

First, I think as a stay at home mom, I know how hard it is. The kids can be difficult. It's hard work. It's exhausting and frustrating at times. I know my husband gets up everyday and goes to work and his job is hard and frustrating too. So when he comes home, I feel like he needs to relax. I shouldn't feel guilty taking time for myself but I do because it means that he has to take over my job when I leave. I shouldn't think of it this way, but I do.

Second, since my "job" doesn't earn an income, I feel guilty spending money on myself. When I have extra cash, I feel like I should spend it on the family - food, clothes for the kids, entertainment the whole family can enjoy. I have a hard time spending money on myself.

There is always guilt, I suppose. I just need to find a way to relax, hand over the keys, and find a way to make money being a stay at home mom.

Me Time

I did a little drawing tonight. I thought you might like a visual of what it's like in my house when I say, "I think I need some me time. Just a few minutes. Maybe I'll go for a walk."



So the figure on the left is me and the screaming blob in the middle is my son, and that clueless object on the right is my husband.

Apology

I love this! Apology to Stay at Home Moms from a new Stay at Home Dad!

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/mike-cavender/my-apology-to-stay-at-home-moms_b_5523450.html?ncid=fcbklnkushpmg00000046&ir=Women

Stay at Home Moms Don't Really Stay Home

It's true. Stay at home moms don't stay home. They can't. If they did, they would go crazy. I get the following question all the time from my non-kid friends, "Don't you get bored staying at home all day?" No, I don't because I don't stay home.

The other question I get all the time is, "Well, if I was a stay at home mom, I'd spend money all day. How do you do it?"

It's not really that hard. There are definitely some days I want to buy everything I see in Target but for the most part, I plan activities for us that don't cost money or are really inexpensive. The great thing is that kids don't know or care. They just enjoy doing different things.

Here are some things we like to do.

1) Picnic - I could write a whole post on picnics. Picnics are the best. Kids are simple, they love doing anything that is new or different. They don't need anything fancy. Pack some sandwiches and snacks and put them in whatever Tupperware you have. Grab an old blanket and take off. Go to a park, or the backyard, or even a different room of the house if the weather is nasty. One time is was raining so hard, I packed a picnic and we ate under the dining room table. The kids loved it.

2) Library - Libraries are amazing. I wish I had realized this sooner. Truth be told, I didn't enter one after college until I had kids. Kids read so much and we get bored reading the same books over and over that it's great to go check out new books every couple of weeks. I like to make it an event. Talk about what kind of books we want to get, read them, and then do some sort of activity around it. My son likes worms, so we got a book on insects and then searched in the backyard for whatever bugs we could find.

3) Recycling Center - My son loves recycling trucks so one day I called up our local recycling center and asked if they give tours. They did! It was great. It was free and my son had the biggest smile on his face. I also learned a lot too.

4) Barnes and Noble - The is a secret for all moms. Going to B&N and letting your kids roam around and look at books, toys and all that B&N has to offer is great. Plus, moms can get a coffee too!

5) Local activities - Do a little research each week on upcoming activities in your town. It takes a few minutes to scan local blogs and the event sections of your local paper but you'll find some good stuff to do. In our town, there is always something going on and most of the time it is free, specially in the summer. Go visit all the local parks (pack a picnic), visit different parts of your town, take your kids to interesting places.

6) Summer movies - During the summer, many theaters will offer free movies during the week. The movies have been out awhile and are usually available on DVD but the experience of going to the theater is always fun for kids. In our town, we have two theaters that do this every Tuesday and Thursday.

7) Visit local farms - Many local farms will let you come take a look and see what they are all about. This is a great learning activity and a great way for kids to see something different.

I'll add to this list in the future. There are always things to do during the day. Don't sit at home!

Genius

Did you see this? Genius. I will never cut grapes one at a time again.

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2014/06/25/cutting-grapes-in-half_n_5528891.html

It's all about the Benjamins.

Something friends don't always talk about is budgeting. Especially in a world where everyone is trying to keep up with everyone else. If all your gal pals have the latest and greatest and want to go out for drinks, expensive dinners and hire babysitters every weekend, it's hard to be the downer and say you can't because it costs too much money.

Here are some tips for those stay at homes moms who gave up their income and now feel the pinch.

1) Cancel Cable TV. It's crap anyways. I know, I know. I used to love my Bravo and all those trashy reality TV shows but I promise, once you break the tether, you really don't miss them. Sign up for Netflix or Hulu Plus and you'll be just fine. Netflix has an amazing selection for kids and for $7.99 a month (plus internet fees), you'll be saving a lot of money.

2) Learn to drink inexpensive wine. I am going to do a whole post on this topic. I'll admit it, I used to be a wine snob but when the going gets tough, you can learn to drink three buck chuck and enjoy it.

3) Modify your wardrobe. This is a great tip I took from my hipster sister-in-law. This summer, take an old sundress and throw a tank top over it. Roll the waist and tie it on the side or add a belt. It's super cute and it gives you a whole new outfit. Plus you'll feel like a hipster! I'll have to get a pic of this to post later.

4) Spend some time learning to cook. Check out recipes on Pinterest and watch some cooking clips on YouTube. You will save a ton of money by not eating out. Plus it's a lot healthier.

5) Mix up your grocery shopping. This may seem obvious but it wasn't to me before I had kids and lived on a budget. I used to do all my grocery shopping at the closest store because it was the easiest. Now I go to two different stores. One of those is Wal-Mart. Don't cringe. I get all of my basics there. Now that I know how much money I can save, I can't stand the thought of buying granola anywhere else. I used to pay $5.99 for a bag for Bare Naked Granola at the grocery store down the street from me. But if I take the time to go ten minutes more down the road to Wal-Mart, I can get it for $3.99. Wal-Mart is not the place for everything. I still have to go to the regular grocery store for specialty items and things like fresh herbs and veggies but it does make a big difference at the end of the day.

6) Don't be afraid of consignment shops. You can get some really great toys and clothing that look new. I hate buying brand new toys. They are too expensive and kids get bored so fast it's pointless to spend so much money on something you can get a lot cheaper. The same goes for kid's clothing. They grow so fast that there is no reason to spend $30 on a shirt they will wear one season.

There are tons of ways to save money and make it possible to be a stay at home mom on one income. I'll continue to post more ideas in the future.

My House is Booby Trapped

Tonight, I almost stepped on this in the kitchen. Either my four year old mistakenly dropped this on the floor and it just happened to land like this, or he is plotting his revenge after I denied him a cookie before bedtime.

Ten Things No One Told You About Being a Stay at Home Mom

1) You will wear the hell out of some yoga pants. My four year old walked into the room this morning and said, "Mom, why are you always in your pajama pants?" "I'm not," I snapped. "These are my yoga pants."

2) You will finish your kids food. Peanut butter and jelly crust. Sure. Apple peels. Why not? Three Goldfish crackers left in the bottom of their snack bowl. This may be your only lunch.

3) Wine time just keeps getting earlier and earlier. When you had a baby, it was after the baby went to sleep. Then it became wine time with dinner. When the baby is about two, wine time gets moved up to while you are cooking. When the kids hit three or four, wine time suddenly becomes 4:00 pm, unless you have a play date scheduled at 3:00 pm and then, well...

4) You vacuum just to get some peace and quiet. Sometimes mom needs some white noise too. When the vacuum comes on, kids seem to wander off and do their own thing.

5) You pretend to need to go to the bathroom when the kids are distracted with something. It feels like sneaking off for a moment to yourself even if it's only to stare in the bathroom mirror and wonder if you should put mascara on before your husband gets home.

6) Sometimes you get dressed and put on mascara right before your husband gets home.

7) You convince yourself that PBS is really, really educational and watching it for an hour or two in the morning, and the afternoon, is OK. Sometimes it's the only way to get stuff done.

8) Walking up and down the stairs fourteen thousand times, carrying cups, books, toys, children and dirty clothes is not really like going to the gym. Damn.

9) Sometimes you make four different meals for dinner. Because you really don't feel like arguing.

10) Sometimes you don't make dinner at all. You serve your kids a hodgepodge of sliced cheese, grapes, teddy grahams, ritz crackers and a piece of rolled up deli turkey. And that's OK too.

The Lost Art of Being a Stay at Home Mom

Yep, that is what I named my blog and it is also the name of my first post. Actually, this is my second post. My first post is a disclaimer/caveat in which I explain that it is not lost on me that staying home with my children is not an option everyone has.

This blog will be about entertaining kids, husbands and most importantly, entertaining yourself. It will be about budget-friendly activities, dinners and clothing. I will share tips, tricks, failings and happy moments, doing what I think is the best job in the world.

Stay at home moms should be proud and honored to have such a great job. It's a hard job. Exhausting and frustrating, and amazing too. And for some reason, over the last decade or so, it is losing the respect it deserves.

Most people I know work full time. I don't have many mom friends who choose to stay home. Almost all of my friends decided to go back to work once they had their first child. The job of the stay at home mom is becoming a lost art.

I know my grandmother's generation and probably my mother's too, didn't have much of a choice. They were made to feel staying home was their only option. Women wanted careers and had passions that extended beyond the home but they weren't given the opportunity to fulfill them because of the way society put pressure on women to stay home. Forty years later, I feel almost the reverse has happened. Society now puts pressure on women to work. Women are supposed to by Super Moms - working full time jobs, raising children, looking perfect, going to PTA, coaching soccer! Hooray! And with that, stay at home moms are now frowned upon. That shouldn't be the case. Stay at home moms should receive just as much respect as working moms. When I left my full time corporate job to stay home with my newborn son, someone actually told me my brain would turn to mush. Seriously. Said this to my face.

I want this blog to highlight stay at home moms. Showcase what we do! Display the lost art of being a stay at home mom. And yeah, prove that our brains do not in fact go soft.

Disclaimer/Caveat

All moms are created equal. Well, most are created equal. I think we can all agree there are some moms out there not fit to be moms but we are going to put them to the side for now. I'm not here to focus on them.

I think moms who stay at home are great. I think moms who work full time are great. I think moms who stay home and have nannies are great. I think moms who send their kids to boarding school are great. Some moms work because they want to, some moms stay home because they want to, some moms work because they have to...you get the idea. Everyone chooses different paths because of their own, unique situations. Some people work, some don't. Some want to, some don't. When we decided that I would stay home and quit my job, we made lots of financial sacrifices. We cut our salary in half. It was a big adjustment. However, it is not lost on me that even living on one salary, however small it may be, may still be more than other people have. I understand not everyone can choose to stay at home. So let's all grab hands, sing songs, and dance around a campfire. All moms are great. Love 'em all. That said, I am a stay at home mom so naturally my perspective is bringing to light the challenges, rewards, aggravation, repetitiveness and all around awesomeness of being a stay at home mom. Disclaimer complete.